Doggone fun! Come to Aunt Maddie's castle, where exploding inventions,
hilarious misadventures and sweet romance are
part of everyday life for
a cast of zany characters and the dogs who talk
to them!
EXCERPT: Aunt Maddiei's
Doggone Misadventures
Ka-boom! The blast shattered the
settling peace of dusk as Marissa Madison pulled into the circular drive. Rissa
threw open the car door and sprinted toward the gray stone house.
“Please, no blood this time,” she
whispered as her feet hit the rough-hewn steps leading up to the broad double
doors.
A bespectacled man stepped through
the doorway amid a confetti shower of envelopes and leaflets. His silvery hair
stood in startled spikes around a balding pate as if it too had been a victim
of the explosion.
“Too much torque in the mail
conveyor,” he muttered with a frown.
“Please turn it off, Uncle Horace!”
“Right.” The old man disappeared
back into the house. Within moments, the clanking stopped and silence fell over
the rolling hills once again.
Just another normal day, Rissa thought, as she surveyed the day’s mail scattered in gay
abandon across the landscape.
The sullen gray sky rumbled
ominously and tossed a few raindrops against her face. Rissa grabbed a check
out of the privet hedge, an overdue bill off the bird bath, a shampoo sample
from the branches of the azaleas, and a plain brown envelope from the lawn.
I hope I didn’t miss anything
important. Rissa scanned the inner courtyard
once more. Lightening crackled across the sky, hurrying her steps back to the
navy blue sedan to grab her briefcase and a bag of groceries. She closed the
heavy wooden door behind her as a gust of wind pushed fat, sloppy raindrops
against the mullioned windows.
Maybe Uncle Horace should invent a
mail dryer instead of a mail conveyer. Rissa
dropped the soggy mail on a cherry wood table as she stepped out of her shoes.
With the bag of groceries balanced on one hip, she padded barefoot toward the
kitchen. A tall figure in a sweeping lavender print dress stood at the sink.
“I couldn’t tell if the grocery
list said chips or cheese, so I got both.” As Rissa moved closer, the person
she thought was her aunt turned toward her. She shrieked and dropped the
groceries. “Ryan!”
Rissa’s twin brother grinned at her
from beneath the purple feathers of one of her aunt’s collection of hats.
“Do I want to know what’s going
on?” Rissa asked warily.
“I’m going to a Valentine’s party
tonight,” Ryan replied.
“Dressed as Aunt Madelaine?” Rissa
retrieved a head of lettuce and a package of marshmallow pinwheel cookies from
the marbled tiles.
“It’s a great way to pick up
women.” Ryan bent down and caught an escaping tomato. “You’d be amazed at what
they tell dear Aunt Mads.”
“You’ve done this before?”
“Sure. Madelaine thinks it’s a
hoot.”
“Where is Aunt Maddie?” Rissa pushed
aside a stack of unwashed dishes to set the tattered grocery bag on the
counter.
Ryan shrugged. “She’s been gone all
day. By the way, I left your food in the microwave since I knew you’d be late.”
Rissa opened the microwave and
poked at the still-warm entree.
“It’s beef tips over rice—one of
your favorites.”
“Thanks.” Rissa glanced over her
shoulder. With the hat pulled low across his face, Ryan bore an uncanny
resemblance to their tall, raw-boned aunt. She couldn’t resist one jibe.
“You’ll make someone a wonderful wife some day.”
Ryan fisted a hand on one hip and
struck a pose until Rissa chuckled.
“Come with me,” Ryan urged. “When
was the last time you went out?”
“Thanks, but I’m tired.”
“You work too hard.”
The truth of her brother’s
statement stirred a wistfulness in Rissa, which she quickly pushed away.
“I think Madelaine might have a
special surprise planned for tonight.” Ryan grinned wickedly.
“What are you scheming now?” Rissa
frowned at her brother.
“Guess you’ll have to come with me
to find out.”
“Oh, no. I’m not falling for that
trick. I’m going to eat this gourmet dinner you so thoughtfully prepared and go
to bed.”
Ryan shrugged, and Madelaine’s
lavender feather boa slid off his shoulder. “Well, you can read about it in the
morning paper anyway.”
Rissa’s fingers gripped the plate
holding her dinner. Ryan was baiting her. That was all. He wouldn’t really do
anything too foolish.
The muffled thud of the front door
echoed her brother’s departure.
He’ll go to the Pink Flamingo, have
a few drinks, pick up another blonde, and come home just before my alarm clock
goes off, Rissa told herself. Nothing out of
the ordinary.
Of course, she never would have
guessed Ryan dressed up as their aunt, either—and apparently got away with it.
“No, I am not going to follow him.”
Rissa marched to the kitchen table, pulled out a chair, and spread a napkin
across her lap. She even lifted a bite of food to her mouth.
“Oh, bother and damnation.” She set
her fork carefully back on her plate. What if her brother really did something
spectacularly stupid? Rissa would have to pick up the pieces anyway. She might
as well stop the disaster before it got started.
KEYWORDS
dogs, time machines, misadventure,1950s, family, talking dogs, zany
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